<editorsnote> Nerds, meet my buddy Julie. You may already know her as Confessions of an Unwed Bride, but she has finally decided to begin to venture out into the dating world and is asking for your help and support as she goes through step by step of this life altering decision. Dudes, this is a BIG deal! She's never dated before ... like ever!! Well, I'll let her tell you more ... HIT IT JULIE! </editorsnote>
#TalkNerdyToMeLover's Julie Wilson
I did it you guys! I did it! I did it! I went out on a date! Happy dance!
I'm so relieved now but by 6pm on Sunday night, the night of date #1, I was a complete mess. To say that I freaked out in the hours leading up to my very first date in 8 years would be an understatement. I started sweating and my face and chest got red and splotchy. I am 29 and the last time I went out on a date was when I was 20. 20!! I was in college at the time and it's different in college. You meet a lot of people organically in class, work, dorms, bars or house parties. I was about to embark on my first "adult date" and I wasn't handling it very well. Plus, this would be the first time I would meet up with someone I met through an online dating site.
I was going to be meeting him at 8pm at a restaurant/bar downtown for drinks. Earlier in the week I axed dinner as my single friends informed me that dinner is too much of an investment for a first date.
My mom calls me to check in on me. I am so flustered trying to get ready that I can't even talk to her. She tries to calm me down but I tell her I have to start getting ready. I grab Jen and have her help me with what I should wear for the evening. I freaked over that. A dress? Pants? Heels? Boots? My converse? Is that too casual? She did her best to console the inconsolable and headed out.
I texted the dude to confirm the address and we texted back and forth for a bit which was kind of a cool lead in to the date. I then called two friends to help me calm down."Do you remember that time that you called me before a date and you were freaking and wanted me to help you calm down. WELL, I NEED YOU TO RETURN THE FAVOR RIGHT NOW!" Another friend called me on my drive to check in on me. I left an hour early to get there in plenty of time and to leave me a few minutes to sit in the car and chill.
I find the place with no problem. I send out a tweet right before I go inside:
I head inside and walk over to the bar. I find a spot with two seats and I sit down. "OMG, Am I going to recognize this person that I have only seen in pictures on OKC?" I don't even have time to continue freaking out because he then walked through the door. Yay! I recognize him! And boom, just like that, the freaking out portion of the evening is over. I click on the socializing function in my brain and I'm all set. He walks my way and Jen's voice echoes in my brain, "Go in for the confident hug to avoid the awkward handshake/kiss" (This is the most practical dating advice I have ever heard btw).
This place has a really interesting drink menu, def not your run of the mill selections. I really just wanted a Newcastle but I can hang, no worries. He orders us two drinks and tells me to try both and take the one I like. One of the drinks has a ‘salt’ rim. While I'm in mid sip he says, "I'll tell you what that rim is made of now. Crickets." Wow, I think to myself, well, if I get nothing else out of this date I can now say I have ingested crickets. He laughs at the face I make as I look at the menu. He says, "It's right on there - but it's in Spanish" (which he speaks. btw - you get points for that because I grew up in South Florida and can't even help my love for Latin men).
Through the course of the evening I realize that he frequents this place, a lot. He knows one of the bartenders well and I start wondering about how many chicks he brings here on dates. The date goes fine, no awkward pauses as we both seem pretty good at polite conversation. But I never have even one moment with this guy where I go, "You like that too?! That's so awesome!" And we talk about music, TV, movies, books. I'm a nerd; you have to be into something in these categories that I'm into. I want to freak out with you over something. Can we argue over DC vs. Marvel or Star Trek vs. Star Wars? He said Weird Science didn't really hold up when he watched it recently. Darn, because that's one of my ALLTIME FAVORITE MOVIES!
We close the place down and he walks me to my car. Again, I go in for the confident hug to avoid awkwardness. He tells me he'd love to see me again, I nervously nod or something, I don't even remember. I do remember walking back to my car so excited that I met my fear head on. I was so scared to date. For so many reasons. I thought I would instantly fall in love if I went on a single date. I didn't.
Overall, I would say this was a success!
The only problem now is this guy will not stop texting me! Soooooo how do you turn down a second date?
Thank you so much TNTML community for your love and support!